A Week of Firsts

We had a really interesting week this week with a lot of firsts. And, as parenthood seems to go, some were good firsts and some, well, not so much. To start it out, we had a trip to the emergency room on Saturday night to get my son's first set of stitches. Five to the eyebrow to be exact. And, as much as I hope this is his first and last set of stitches, I know it will not be our last trip at night to the emergency room. But, he handled it like the trooper that he is. They gave him some feel good medicine and he sang Old MacDonald, complete with the EIEIOs, while getting said stitches. All in all, I think it was way more traumatizing for me than it was for him. In fact, it is still a bit traumatizing to me every time I see his poor eyebrow. As his mom, I want to coat him in bubble wrap. Put him in a giant plastic bubble, like John Travolta. But, I know that I can't. These are the things that make him the person that he will become. He will now have a scar story about the stitches he got when he was two. He will have a million more stories and experiences with different falls, cuts and broken bones (I hope not). But, he will be fine. He will be stronger for it because these are the things make you tough. And, if there is one thing you need for this world, it is toughness. So, world, be ready for him, because he is already building his resume.

The second, and almost as nerve-racking for me, first this week was his first day at school. He is going to a local preschool here that I think he is going to love. And, it is only a couple days a week for a few hours. But, he will be away from me for really the first time other than with my husband or a babysitter once in a blue moon. He will meet new friends, play with new toys, sing new songs, and all the other great things you do in school. He will grow up so much this year, I just know it. But, I am terrified and a bit sad that he won't be doing it with me. How will they know when he is sad or lonely? Who will he show his art to? Who will know that he likes it when you count his jumps? He and I are around each other so much that I think we have melded into one person sometimes. And, I also know that this isn't necessarily healthy. He needs to feel comfortable going out on his own and trying new things. He needs to have other people in this world than his dad and I that he trusts. He needs to learn all the rules of childhood that only children can teach each other. And, I need to regain some of myself that I gave up when I had him. I love being a mom, but I somewhere along the line, I lost myself. So, I know it will be good for us. I know that at the end of the year, I will be so glad we did this. But, that doesn't mean that right now, I can't be a bit sad as he walks into his world without me.